“I came to Los Angeles with 3 phone numbers in my pocket. Within 4 months, I had been invited to dinner at the playboy mansion, bought a glass of whiskey by the Governor of California and taken to Tahiti on a private jet.”
The first time I had lunch with AJ and Jordan, we talked about my background. Specifically, how I came to LA and my early experiences here last year. I mentioned the above, and it’s something that seems to have resounded with both AJ and Jordan, as they asked me to write about how I took 3 phone numbers and turned them into a fulfilling social life and business network.
One of the main concepts I talk and teach about revolves around the differences between Social Power and Social Influence. Social Influence is the number of persons that an individual can physically connect with at any given time. Social Power is the capacity for an individual to directly or indirectly cause an effect on other ís behavior.
When dealing with social circles and groups of people, both Social Influence and Social Power must be addressed. The person with SOCIAL INFLUENCE can invite or add you to the group, but it’s the person with SOCIAL POWER that must endorse you for you to remain. This is a very deep topic that I go into much more detail in the curriculum. However, we are going to quickly look at Social Influence, and how an understanding of this concept enabled me to quickly build a large social network for myself.
Individuals, who have a lot of social influence, have huge social networks. They know many different people from many different walks of life. They are constantly growing their social networks, and enhancing whom they can have access to. People that fall into this category amongst others are promoters, publicists, talent managers, pr executives and concierge managers. Their job is to know as many people as possible.
When in any new city or social environment, to build your network fast, you need to be introduced to many new people. The easiest way of going about this is to have as many people of social influence in your inner circle as possible. These people can be viewed as social hubs; they can, and will introduce you to literally hundreds of people.
It’s easy to spot a person with a lot of Social Influence. Other than the examples above, go to any social gathering, and observe the interactions going on between people. The individuals going around talking to everyone and receiving positive reactions have large amounts of social influence. These are people that you should be looking to add to your inner circle. An opening conversation can even begin with:
“Hi, you seem like a very sociable person. I’m new in town and slowly getting to know interesting people and thought I’d come over and introduce myself.”
A simple, genuine and sincere introduction goes a long way.
The 3 phone numbers I had when I first came to LA were:
- The owner of a PR company
- The head of client relations at a hotel
- An international model
When I say only 3 numbers, it sounds small, but it has nothing to do with how many people you know, but who you know. These were all people with huge networks and who have a lot of Social Influence. Start working on this aspect of your life, and you’ll see the benefits immediately.
